FAQ 1: do writers have to use social media?

Or, put it another way, should everyone run a marathon?

This post is part of series where I answer some of the questions I am most frequently asked about social media. To browse or read the rest of the series click here.

TLDR: I believe in the power of social media to reach your readers and promote your work, BUT insisting all writers show up on social media is a bit like insisting everyone must run a marathon.

Every so often my husband tries to convince me to sign up for a marathon (or a half-marathon, or a 10k, or a programme of bootcamp classes).

He does this because he cares, because he hears me complaining about feeling stiff and weak, and thinks he has The Solution.

To be fair, once upon a time I was into exercise: pre-babies I ran and went to the gym several times a week; post-babies and pre-Covid I was into yoga. I was strong and fit and it felt good, so his efforts to get me back into exercise aren’t as dictatorial as they perhaps sound.

Despite his efforts, and for reasons I won’t go into now, my daily exercise currently amounts to an hour’s dog walk, and the many laps of my house having two children necessitates.

I love watching marathons though. I think elite athletes are other-worldly, and runners who raise money for charity are nothing short of heroic. I’ve stood on the sidelines and swallowed lumps in my throat as strangers cheer on wave after wave of strangers. I’ve witnessed the euphoric transcendence of friends and family members who’ve crossed the finish line.

I’ve nodded admiringly as they’ve told me how affirming it was to push their body to its limits and emerge on the other side. How in those hours and minutes they gained new perspective; how the endeavour dwarfed other challenges and somehow made them feel more surmountable.

My response is always, I will never.

People’s reaction to this varies. With the evangelism of recent converts some launch into monologues that extol the virtues of training for months, and completing the 26 mile long ordeal itself, so comprehensively I’m left wondering who they’re really trying to convince. Others assume I lack self-belief and just need a little encouragement.

‘It’s ok,’ I shrug, without a trace of inadequacy. ‘I’m just not a marathon person.’

It’s not fear, lack of self-belief, or even shortage of time to train that stops me from running a marathon.

I don’t say marathon running is not for me because I haven’t heard the right argument yet; I won’t ever run a marathon because I don’t want to.

Insisting that writers show up on social media shares many characteristics with the ‘marathon-people’ vs ‘non-marathon-people’ conversation.

Some writers are resistant to social media because they don’t fully understand it, while others are afraid of looking ‘big-headed’, stupid, or of sharing ‘too much’. Some writers find it a creative drain on the time they’d rather spend writing, and a surprising number of writers think they’ve ‘got nothing to say’ (to which I always reply, you’re a writer, of course you have things to say). I can help with all of these things.

But occasionally I encounter someone who listens politely to everything I have to say, who shares my confidence social media can help them reach more readers, but who then says, ‘I don’t want to be on social media - do I have to be?’

Even the distance of a Zoom call can’t quite disguise the discomfort that often accompanies this question - perhaps they’re aware of the daring of their counter-cultural stance, perhaps they expect me to scorn them, criticise them, or try to convert them, but instead I ask them why?

Occasionally they explain they don’t like the way the platforms operate, they don’t like the way it feels, they don’t like what it does to their thinking or the pressure of creating ‘content’ when all they want to do is write.

I like to think I can tell if people need a little encouragement or advice from the way they frame their question and answer, or if they’re testing me to see if I’ll tell them truth: no, writers do not have to be on social media.

My answer sometimes elicits some surprise. I pay my bills by supporting writers with their social media, after all, and the dominant cultural narrative is that an online presence is a pre-requisite for any kind of success in any kind of field, but my reasoning is simple: insisting a writer who does not want to be on social media, uses social media is exactly like insisting I should run a marathon.

I’m not going to do the necessary training, I’m going to waste a lot of time grumbling and feeling crappy, when I do show up I’m not going to give it my all, and I’m highly unlikely to make it to the start line when the day comes. I do not see how running a marathon is going to add anything except pain, inconvenience, and something to complain about, into my life.

My resistance to running a marathon - or, frankly, anywhere - might be mildly irritating to my husband, might mean I never experience wonder at the capacity of my body (ahem, pregnancy) or be introduced to its limits (ahem, childbirth), but when you put aside the evangelism it turns out there are many, many other ways to exercise, just as there are many, many other ways to find your readers.

Photo by Jack Hamilton on Unsplash